Okay, so have you ever found yourself "caught" in a conversation where you begin to notice that every word coming from your mouth is foreign? - Like you can hear yourself speaking in a manner that completely contradicts what your heart believes about a subject? Did that make sense?
For instance, tonight I was talking with a couple of friends about relationships because somehow, some way, conversation amongst a group of singles never fails to take this route. Or maybe that is just in my world? Anyway, tonight we were talking about who is seeing who and who is NOT interested in who, and so forth... and all of a sudden I start chiming in with comments that put my heart in a very vulnerable position. I start talking about my insecurities, my faults, my worries, my anxieties until I'm drowning in a pool of self pity for myself. Suddenly, I'm too old, too fat and too independent... I picture myself wrinkly, gray and lonely rocking on a chair somewhere on this random porch in the middle of nowhere! What on earth?! I'm 22! I'm not fat! And I've been fortunate enough to see a bit of this world, so what?! It is amazing how one thought can throw you into a spiral of negativity and doubt! Meanwhile, if these same couple of friends could hear what is really in my heart... this conversation would have been completely different!
Because honestly, I know that I know that God has an amazing man for me... somewhere out there... I know that patience perfects, that love should not be awakened before its time, and that waiting upon the Lord and His timing is an absolute honor! Life is fleeting and I, of all people, believe strongly in ceasing the moment and embracing the season God has strategically placed you in - to appreciate the now!
More than ever, I want to hold myself accountable for the words that depart my lips. I want everything that comes out of my mouth to be edifying, true, and hopeful. God is faithful, His word will not return void and He knows the desires of my heart. So I think it is time for my conversation to reflect such things...
Love will surely find its way into my world but for now... why not align my speech with words of truth, integrity and faith!
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You are gorgeous, thoughtful, sweet, joyful, kind, loving, faith-filled, wise, funny, smart, amazing and encouraging. You are not independent you are dependent completely on Christ and living on your own and have traveled the world, I believes makes you ready for prince charming. I can't wait to meet him either. He is going to be an amazing guy and love everything about you, your smile, your feet, your accents, and your love of life!! Love you!
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